"Whatever you do in life will be insignificant, 

but it's very important that you do it."

The most beautiful and selfless person I have ever met. Your courage was incredible. I know you are always watching over us, and Mum has gained so much strength from you. I cannot believe you are gone. You are always in my heart and on my mind. You have left a part of you with us all, and we have become stronger. Nothing will ever heal the heart ache, but the beautiful memories we have with you will always remain. You are a true inspiration. You helped so many people in your life, you left your mark in this world. So many people love you, so many people miss you. I am honoured to call you family, and to have spent such great times with you. I will look after Mum, she has been so strong through this.

You are now in paradise, where this is no more sadness, weeping or pain, only peace and happiness forever. I love you.

Rest in Peace.

I cried with the shower this morning. The rain continues to pour. I sit here and wander what to do, or how to do it. Today, escaping won't fix anything. Everybody is tangled in their worlds, their problems, their secrets. Although not all who wander are lost, today, I am afraid, that I am lost. I can't focus, everything is spinning out of control. I am scared to think of what lies ahead. There is so much hope, but it is lying on the ocean floor. I need someone to talk to, but I don't know if there is anybody that I can tell everything. I feel like I need a release. Speaking out loud, about how I feel, makes everything seem easier, like when the words are released from my mouth, I am able to visualise them in proportion to the World. I don't exactly know what it is that I am hoping for, besides that I would like things to get better.

The List.

Can't wait for the Summer, for so many reasons.

I keep thinking about that night. It happened so quickly, so secretly. I don't know if I should have done it. I can't stop thinking about you.

I hope you feel the same way I do. I want to see you again. I remember that day, soaring by your side like a bird, the way you made me feel. Your smile was full of passion. I long to see that again. I love your nature. I love how much you care, I love your positivity and warmth. You were the strength in me that day, without you, I don't know how I would have gotten through it. You make me smile. I think about you all the time. The world needs more beautiful people like you.

Forget prior engagements, cancel your plans.

Let's do something amazing while we still can.

Over it all.

I hate the secrets.

I hate the lies.

I hate the judgement.

I hate denying the truth.

I hate how we all don't get along anymore.

I hate how I don't know who to trust.

I hate the fake hugs and smiles.

I hate how you always pretend.

I hate the gossip.

I hate that you always get what you want.

I hate the pain this all brings everyone.

I hate this whole thing. It's so unnecessary. You're making this so much worse than it needs to be. What is all this about? You probably don't even know. You just like the drama, and being the centre of attention. As much as you try and convince yourself that you are a great person, I can see right through you.

Bali

I can't wait to go back to Bali. I love the weather, I love the beach, I love the resort. Lifestyle over there is amazing; so laid back. I love the adventures awaiting, I love the tropical drinks and the Bintangs. I love getting a tan. I love surfing there. I love Billy. I love Bali.

I want to dance again.

Pushover

I am sick of being indecisive. I hate not knowing what I want. I'm always worried about what other people will think about me. I do things when people say it's a good idea, managing to block out my own instinct. I am too worried about the happiness of others and sacrificing my own happiness for it. Maybe this is a good thing. My mum told me the other day to stop being such a pushover. She's right. She also told me that being too nice doesn't get you anywhere. This is also true to an extent. I need to learn to say no. I need to listen to my instincts and stick to my gut feeling. I can still be nice to people without being a pushover. Perhaps I need to start considering myself in the equation. Otherwise, I will end up with nothing. Nothing, and no one.

These days turned out nothing like I had planned.

Surround yourself only with people who will lift you higher.

Wasted Opportunities

Too many wasted opportunities and hesitations are banked in my memory. From now on, I will just do it. If I fail, at least I know the outcome, instead of always wondering what would have happened. The boy from Sydney I met on Bar Beach, I wish I agreed to walk with you, had I not been so nervous, I would have. Every morning on my run, I would go past your place, and hope you would for some reason be up early and outside. Everyday turned out to be hopeless. Opportunity missed for a great friendship. This may have been only a little thing, but I can't keep doing this. I hate the feeling I get when I look back on things and all I can think of is 'I should have..." "I wish I..." "If only..." "I wonder if..." I'm sick of it. From now on, I will just go with it. Try new things, branch out and give things a go. I need to say yes more. I need to be open. No more regrets or wasted opportunities. I only get one shot.

We so Funny.

I like how we get along. I love how we don't care about all the drama. I love how we think we're hilarious. It's weird because I just got a text from you. I love our laughing fits with uncontrollable body pulsing because of intense laughter. I love how we can give each other a look and know what each other is thinking. I like how we procrastinate. I love our thought process. I love our dancing. I love our songs. I like our nicknames. I love how we like corny movies. I love how it's weird being deep and meaningful. I love how we laugh when we shouldn't. I love how we're happy.

When I look to Sky, something tells me You're here with Me.

When I look at a star up above me each night, I wonder how many other people are also looking at that star. That lonely, sparkling star holds the hopes, prayers and wishes of so many people from many different places. This star is a friend. A faithful friend, who returns every night, unless God feels it necessary to test our strength, by creating a sheet of clouds to cover our friend. For this night, we are left alone, with no star to gaze at and left without the feeling of as though someone understands, and that someone out there is looking out for us. We must be grateful for such nights, because our inner strength and perseverance is discovered. The friendly star is a beacon of guidance that temporarily removes us from the reality of Earth and takes us beyond the atmosphere where miracles are possible. We connect with this star each night. We talk with this star. Sometimes, we show envy of this star's beauty and it's easy life way up in the sky. When I look up to that star above me each night, I wonder how many other people are also looking at that star. I hope those people are okay.